No, it just sucks.

I was sitting down to draft this post when I received an email from a friend telling me her mother died on Monday, the viewing is today, and the funeral on Friday. She said they like to drag things out.

I'm deeply sorry that her mother has died. It's hard, and the pain is deep.

When Daddy died last July 30th, we heard deeply felt words of comfort from many wonderful people. Many were from a Christian perspective. "He's in a better place." "He's [points finger to the sky]. "He's with the Lord."

I know these people were trying to soften the agony of Daddy's going. And I know they truly believed what they were saying: that Daddy was with Jesus, and that's the best place to be.

Reading the obits in the Wise newspaper, The Coalfield Progress, today, I found this:

"Although Cricket will be greatly missed by her loved ones, we rejoice
in the promise of our risen savior "We are confident, I say, and willing rather to be absent from the body, and to be present with the Lord." (2 Cor 5:8)"

This time last year, I would have welcomed that calm acceptance of Daddy's death, that wonderful knowledge that he is indeed in a better place. And he may be. My guess, though, is that he'd just as soon be here flying his airplane, working in his garden, lifting weights at the gym....living rather than dead. He'd choose Dylan Thomas over Jesus:

Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rage at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

We'd certainly prefer that he be here with us, being "present" with the Lord be damned.

And last summer, after one too many soothing "He's with the Lord.", I turned to Susie and said sotto voce "No, it just sucks."

So to Sue, who's mourning her mother's going, I have no words of comfort. It just sucks.